Monday, January 19, 2009

My party lines

it's Saturday night..time to PARTEY!
i hate that line. i hate people who say that as well. i hate people who are out every sat nite PARTEYing. i hate the PARTEYs.
now don't take me for someone who stands out side the line, looking in at all the fun.
i have joined in these soirees. i have laughed and tet-a-teted with the night celebrities.
I carry along a wad of lines to use while out partying. Things that get me a free drink or allow me to get introduced to the cute guy I'm checking out. Either way they are simply lines, fake and frilly. But all have underlying meanings, which i plan to reveal today int eh exclusive,
WHAT DOES SHE MEAN BY THAT BLOG POST
No1> "Wow! i love your shoes, where from?"
Meaning: I've scanned you completely and cant find any other part of you to compliment. Also I'd rather talk about something that sole full than attempt for something soulful.

No2> "Oh! yeah I'm on work duty.."
Meaning: I'm bored but I'd rather fake working than stand here talking to you

No3> "No thanks, I'm happy with my coke."
Meaning: i wouldn't take a drink from you, for fear that you might spike it. Also i want to stay sober and remember your face, so i can avoid you the next time

No4> "Hey, oh yeah, i haven't been out because i had other things to do"
Meaning: I'd rather stay at home reading a book about Russian communists, than come to a club and watch them instead dancing around poles, giggling at the lame jokes thrown out by desperate rich men.

No5> "Nah, still single"
Meaning: I haven't been able to find any one worth my wit

No6> "I'm concentrating on my self right now."
Meaning: I'd rather die an old hag than date you. I mean seriously! Do you think i would want to pick my next boy friend in a club!!!!???

No7> "Oh, man, you are so funny"
Meaning: i beg you to stop talking and just get my Pepsi refill

No8> "Oh we were just discussing the new book by Salman Rushdie...."
Response: "*awkward silence"

Here, switch to line No1
"Wow, i love your shoes,w here did you get them from?
Meaning: Do u know about anything aside from the latest fad diet? —
Oh no. you don't? — Well at least you have nice shoes!